Got 300 Holes In His Face

Peace of Mind?

March 4, 2011

Corporate Lessons

February 28, 2011

Corporate lessons

by Rahul

 Mon Aug 14, 2006

CORPORATE LESSON #1:

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A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, The wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, The next door neighbor.

Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 Just to Drop that towel that you have on”. After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands n*ked in front of Bob.

Bob has a close look at her for a few seconds, hands over $800 and quietly leaves.

Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom, her husband asks from the shower “Who was that?”

“It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies.

“Great,” the husband says, “did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

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MORAL OF THE STORY:

Share critical credit information with your Stakeholders to Prevent Avoidable exposure!

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CORPORATE LESSON # 2

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A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he stopped and offered her a lift which she gladly accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg.

The priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The Nun looked at him and immediately said, “Father, remember psalm 129?”

The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself to remove his hand. However, he was unable to remove his eyes from her leg.

Further on, while changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?”

Once again the priest apologized. “Sorry sister, but the mind is weak.”

Arriving at the convent, the nun got out, gave him a meaningful glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the Church, the Priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm 129.

It Said, “Go forth and seek; further up, you will find Glory.”

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MORAL OF THE STORY:

Always be well informed in your job; or, you might Miss great Opportunities!

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CORPORATE LESSON # 3

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There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they Rubbed the Bottle, a genie appears.

Thankful that the 4 guys had Released him Out of the bottle, he said, “Next to you all are 4 Swimming pools,

I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and Jump, you shout What you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true.”

The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted WINE”. The pool immediately changed into a Pool of wine.

The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.

Next is the Russian’s turn, he did the same and shouted, “VODKA” and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.

The German was next and he jumped and shouted, “BEER”. He was so contented with his beer pool.

The last is the American. He was running towards the Pool when Suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards The pool
And shouted, “CRAP !!!!!!!………”

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MORAL OF THE STORY:

Mind your language, you never Know what it will land you in.

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CORPORATE LESSON # 4

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A young executive was leaving the office at 6 PM when he found the CEO standing in front of a paper shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.

“Listen,” said the CEO, “this is a very sensitive and important document and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing Work?”

“Certainly, Sir” said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

“Excellent, excellent!” said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine.”I just need one copy.”

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MORAL OF THE STORY:

Never, ever assume that your BOSS knows everything.

http://www.fropki.com/corporate-lessons-vt2873.html

Reverse Cell Phone Numbers Search: Sprint Reverse Cell Phone Number Lookup

Reverse Cell Phone Numbers Search services can help you if you just have a cellular number or unlisted number to trace callers. Of course, you still need to use a reliable reverse service that can fulfill your requirements.

PRLog (Press Release) – Feb 22, 2011 – Whatever the requirement (to discover the identity of bothersome prank callers, check who someone is talking with every now and again, or whose number that is on a partner’s caller ID etc.) the net now allows us to acquire information which not so long ago would have needed a lot of money and time. By doing a Reverse Cell Phone Numbers Search you can immediately lookup unlisted fixed numbers and cellular phone numbers and get facts about the phone owner within just a few minutes.

For a Free preview search with our TOP Reverse Phone Service Visit Here: http://www.REVERSE-CELL-PHONE-SEARCH.info/reverse-lookup

Is there an absolutely free Reverse Cell Phone Numbers Search directory? Unfortunately not, there’s nearly always a scam involved. Some need you to complete surveys, ‘free’ trial offers, or even fill out loan applications. Others demand your confidential info in return for a reverse phone lookup. Of course the minute you fill in surveys or give out your confidential info you are immediately at the mercy of internet marketers. Some sites offering a free reverse phone search claim the “search” is free and you will need to shell out for the full report. You get the picture…

All this is utterly ridiculous but of course the reality is cellular phone databases are secured by privacy laws. Reverse lookup websites legally buy access to the databases which they use to classify and compile their own directories. These directories (if maintained properly) are quite expensive to keep up to date, and in order for the reverse phone services to generate some revenue they must charge the end user for the convenience.

Some advantages of performing a reverse cell phone search are that you can gather any facts about a number of people at the same time or even just the numbers themselves. You can get the results of your reverse lookup in only a few minutes and information supplied will contain the name and addresses of the person you may be searching for. Your lookup can be made in the privacy of your own home with no one knowing it was done or who did it.

Being your own or somebody else’s detective and discovering the personal details of a stalker, bothering caller, and checking anything that strikes you as suspicious, can be intriguing and rewarding. You, your family or friends don’t have to be constantly irritated by prank calls or let funny conduct or negative feelings get the better of you.

To compare the TOP 3 Reverse Phone Lookup Services Click Here: http://www.REVERSE-CELL-PHONE-SEARCH.info

http://www.prlog.org/11321845-reverse-cell-phone-numbers-search-sprint-reverse-cell-phone-number-lookup.html

The next person who asks me when I’m getting married will get punched
By Pam Pastor
Philippine Daily Inquirer
DateFirst Posted 22:05:00 01/02/2011

How’s this for a New Year’s resolution? Stop asking single people when they’re getting hitched
THE NEXT person who asks me when I’m getting married will get punched in the face. Seriously.

The regular person faces a lot of stress during the holiday season—there are gifts to buy, gifts to wrap, traffic to sit through, parties to go to, reunions to prepare for, food to cook, calories to count—but the unmarried person has to go through one more: dodging that stupid question.

“When are you getting married?”

It happens all the time. At parties, at family gatherings, in your own home, whenever you bump into someone you haven’t seen in a long time. And it’s not just me. Other unmarried friends go through the same thing. And it doesn’t even matter if we’re in relationships or not; they just keep asking the question, like we can just decide tomorrow that we want to throw on a white dress and sashay down that aisle.

And the question comes from all kinds of people—relatives, family friends, old friends, new friends, even virtual strangers.

We’ve exhausted all kinds of answers, from tongue-in-cheek to downright rude.

“Bukas.”

“Sakit lang ng ulo yan.”

“Bakit, ikaw ba magbabayad?”

“When I grow up.”

“When Brad leaves Angelina.”

“After your daughter does.”

“When the voices in my head stop.”

“I already am—to my laptop.”

“I’m waiting until I get pregnant.”

“The thought of waking up next to the same person makes me wanna throw up and cry.”

“And live like you? Never.”

“When I’m done with therapy.”

“When you stop asking me that question.”

But we’re done with just laughing it off.

I don’t know what Emily Post book you’re reading, but “When are you getting married?” is not an acceptable alternative to “How are you?” (Neither is “Ang taba mo ngayon!” but that deserves another article entirely.)

I don’t know why you think it’s okay.

Has this line become your official conversation starter? Is this your idea of small talk? Do you have nothing else to say to me? Do you honestly want to know? Are you that bored with your own life? Why do you want to know?

Are you buying my wedding cake? Do you want to be the first to run to Rustan’s for my gift registry? Are you dying to be my ninang?

I’m 30 and have no dreams of wearing a veil and sending out lacy invitations. I don’t fantasize about picking ring bearers and flower girls. I don’t stock up on bridal magazines. I have no secret list of bridesmaids in my head. That does not give anyone the right to pry into my life.

I don’t ask you why you and your wife still don’t have kids. I don’t ask when your husband will stop cheating on you. I don’t ask if you are going through menopause. I don’t ask when you will stop drinking. I don’t ask if your boobs are real. I don’t ask when you last went to the dentist. Stop asking when I’m getting married.

It’s annoying, it’s intrusive and it may get you physically injured.

So don’t. For the love of God and all things white and shiny, stop asking. Stop asking if I’m getting married, stop asking when I’m getting married. Because even if I were, you wouldn’t be invited.

http://lifestyle.inquirer.net/sundaylifestyle/sundaylifestyle/view/20110102-312057/The-next-person-who-asks-me-when-Im-getting-married-will-get-punched-in-the

February 2011 Gatherings by Camelia

“Came” means Business Networking (referral business/business gathering)

welcome to Camelia gatherings

Came 315
7 February 2011 (monday)
Time: 2pm to 4pm
Venue: Burger King,Sunway Pyramid Mall,Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia.

Came 316
7 February 2011 (monday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Old Town White Coffee,Kelana Street Mall,Jalan ss6,Petaling Jaya, Selangor,Malaysia.(near Giant Kelana Jaya / LDP)

Came 317
8 February 2011 (friday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Coffee Bean,Pavilion Mall,Jalan Bukit Bintang,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

Came 318
13 February 2011 (sunday)
Time: 3pm to 5pm
Venue: A & W Restaurant,Suria KLCC Mall,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

Came 319
13 February 2011 (monday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Old Town White Coffee,Jalan Pasar 1/21 (PJ Old Town)Petaling Jaya, Selangor,Malaysia

Came 320
15 February 2011 (tuesday)
Time: 3pm to 5pm
Venue: Old Town White Coffee,Leisure Shopping Mall,Tmn Segar,Cheras,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

Came 321
16 February 2011 (wednesday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Old Town White Coffee,Berjaya Times Square,Jalan Imbi,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

Came 322
16 February 2011 (wednesday)
Time: 8pm to 10pm
Venue: Old Town White Coffee,Berjaya Times Square,Jalan Imbi,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

Came 323
25 February 2011 (friday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Pappa Rich,Dataran 32, Jalan 14 (jalan 19) Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia. (opposite Toyota Showroom)

Came 324
25 February 2011 (friday)
Time: 8pm to 10pm
Venue: Pappa Rich,Dataran 32, Jalan 14 (jalan 19) Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia. (opposite Toyota Showroom)

Came 325
26 February 2011 (saturday)
Time: 3pm to 5pm
Venue: Nyonya Colors,The Curve Shopping Mall,Mutiara Damansara, Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia.

Came 326
28 February 2011 (monday)
Time: 6pm to 8pm
Venue: Station 1 cafe,sunway mentari, PJS, Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia. (next Sunway Pyramid Mall)

Came 327
28 February 2011 (monday)
Time: 8pm to 10pm
Venue: Station 1 cafe,sunway mentari, PJS, Petaling Jaya,Selangor,Malaysia. (next Sunway Pyramid Mall)

Pls Call /SMS to confirm the date/place/time.

Please give me time to reserve a seat for you.

Do not be LAST MINUTE.I will not entertain you.

You may bring your friends or bosses or spouse.

PLEASE BE PUNCTUAL, Thank you!!

Mobile : 6-016-9795515
Love Camelia
Malaysian Chinese lady

*Venue and time subject to change
*Please pay your drinks / meals
*No entrance fee and no membership

6 Things You Should Never Reveal on Facebook
by Kathy Kristof
Tuesday, September 14, 2010

The whole social networking phenomenon has millions of Americans sharing their photos, favorite songs and details about their class reunions on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter and dozens of similar sites. But there are a handful of personal details that you should never say if you don’t want criminals — cyber or otherwise — to rob you blind, according to Beth Givens, executive director of the Privacy Rights Clearinghouse.
The folks at Insure.com also say that ill-advised Facebook postings increasingly can get your insurance cancelled or cause you to pay dramatically more for everything from auto to life insurance coverage. By now almost everybody knows that those drunken party photos could cost you a job, too.

[See 7 Things to Stop Doing Now on Facebook]

You can certainly enjoy networking and sharing photos, but you should know that sharing some information puts you at risk. What should you never say on Facebook, Twitter or any other social networking site?

Your Birth Date and Place

Sure, you can say what day you were born, but if you provide the year and where you were born too, you’ve just given identity thieves a key to stealing your financial life, said Givens. A study done by Carnegie Mellon showed that a date and place of birth could be used to predict most — and sometimes all — of the numbers in your Social Security number, she said.

Vacation Plans

There may be a better way to say “Rob me, please” than posting something along the lines of: “Count-down to Maui! Two days and Ritz Carlton, here we come!” on Twitter. But it’s hard to think of one. Post the photos on Facebook when you return, if you like. But don’t invite criminals in by telling them specifically when you’ll be gone.

[See Burglars Picked Houses Based on Facebook Updates]

Home Address

Do I have to elaborate? A study recently released by the Ponemon Institute found that users of Social Media sites were at greater risk of physical and identity theft because of the information they were sharing. Some 40% listed their home address on the sites; 65% didn’t even attempt to block out strangers with privacy settings. And 60% said they weren’t confident that their “friends” were really just people they know.

Confessionals

You may hate your job; lie on your taxes; or be a recreational user of illicit drugs, but this is no place to confess. Employers commonly peruse social networking sites to determine who to hire — and, sometimes, who to fire. Need proof? In just the past few weeks, an emergency dispatcher was fired in Wisconsin for revealing drug use; a waitress got canned for complaining about customers and the Pittsburgh Pirate’s mascot was dumped for bashing the team on Facebook. One study done last year estimated that 8% of companies fired someone for “misuse” of social media.

Password Clues

If you’ve got online accounts, you’ve probably answered a dozen different security questions, telling your bank or brokerage firm your Mom’s maiden name; the church you were married in; or the name of your favorite song. Got that same stuff on the information page of your Facebook profile? You’re giving crooks an easy way to guess your passwords.

Risky Behaviors

You take your classic Camaro out for street racing, soar above the hills in a hang glider, or smoke like a chimney? Insurers are increasingly turning to the web to figure out whether their applicants and customers are putting their lives or property at risk, according to Insure.com. So far, there’s no efficient way to collect the data, so cancellations and rate hikes are rare. But the technology is fast evolving, according to a paper written by Celent, a financial services research and consulting firm.

http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/110663/6-things-you-should-never-reveal-on-facebook


Line2: Turn an iPod Touch into an iPhone
There’s some big news about Line2, the iPhone app I reviewed in March. As I’m sure you remember, I wrote:

For a little $1 iPhone app, Line2 sure has the potential to shake up an entire industry. It can save you money. It can make calls where AT&T’s signal is lousy, like indoors. It can turn an iPod Touch into a full-blown cellphone. And it can ruin the sleep of cellphone executives everywhere.

Line2 gives your iPhone a second phone number — a second phone line, complete with its own contacts list, voicemail, and so on. … But that’s not the best part.

The Times’s technology columnist, David Pogue, keeps you on top of the industry in his free, weekly e-mail newsletter.
Sign up | See SampleLine2 also turns the iPhone into a dual-mode phone. That is, it can make and receive calls either using the AT&T airwaves as usual, or — now this is the best part — over the Internet. Any time you’re in a wireless hot spot, Line2 places its calls over Wi-Fi instead of AT&T’s network.

That’s a game-changer. Where, after all, is cellphone reception generally the worst? Right — indoors. In your house or your office building, precisely where you have Wi-Fi.

Line2 also runs on the iPod Touch. When you’re in a Wi-Fi hot spot, your Touch is now a full-blown cellphone, and you don’t owe AT&T a penny.

But wait, there’s more.

Turns out Wi-Fi calls don’t use up any AT&T minutes. You can talk all day long, without ever worrying about going over your monthly allotment of minutes. Wi-Fi calls are free forever.

I calculated that Line2, even at $15 a month, could save you money:

If you’re in a Wi-Fi hot spot most of the time (at work, for example), that’s an awful lot of calling you can do in Wi-Fi — probably enough to downgrade your AT&T plan to one that gives you fewer minutes. If you’re on the 900-minute or unlimited plan ($90 or $100 a month), for example, you might be able to get away with the 450-minute plan ($70). Even with Line2’s fee, you’re saving $5 or $15 a month.

Well, now there’s a new Line2. All kinds of fixes and enhancements are in the new app — you can delete individual Recent Calls entries, incoming calls to your Line2 number ring your iPhone even if Line2 isn’t running, and so on. But the big news is the two changes to the value proposition.

First, Line2 now costs $10 a month instead of $15.

Second, you can now send and receive text messages using your Line2 number.

That’s very convenient, of course, because it means people don’t have to remember to use one number to talk to you, and a different one to send text messages. It’s also great because you can now do text messages when you’re in a Wi-Fi hot spot but have no AT&T signal indoors.

But the best part is how much money you could save. As the company explains it:

AT&T’s unlimited calling plan is $70 [not including the mandatory $30 for Internet service]. Unlimited texting is another $20. So for unlimited calling and texting, you must pay AT&T $90 a month. With Line2, you can drop your AT&T texting plan entirely, and drop your calling plan to the 450-minute plan at $40. So subtract $50 from your AT&T bill, add our new price of $10, and you are saving $40 a month!

It’s pretty persuasive math.

You can now send and receive texts using your Line2 number.And here’s something else persuasive: Line2 turns an iPad or iPod Touch into a Wi-Fi iPhone. If you’re a parent whose child is begging for a first cellphone, this could be a cheap way to grant calling and texting without a two-year AT&T commitment. (Many schools and most colleges these days have campuswide Wi-Fi, and the current iPod Touch has a built-in mike.) Whenever you’re not in a hot spot, calls go to voicemail, and you get e-mail to let you know. Text messages appear as soon as you’re back in a hot spot. You can return the messages and calls at that point.

The new texting feature works great; I even tried sending texts to and from my Google Voice number. Text message back-and-forths show up in little cartoon bubbles, exactly as they do in the iPhone’s own texting app.

The one catch: For now, Line2 doesn’t do picture and video messages — only text messages. (The company says it’s working on it.) Of course, you can always send photos and videos over AT&T’s service for the 20-cent à la carte message fee, even if you’ve canceled your AT&T texting plan.

Overall, the lower fee and the unlimited texting make Line2 even more attractive (and further distinguish it from calling-only programs like Skype; see this comparison). My one worry, in fact, is that this review will swamp the company’s servers and drag the service down with it, as my first review did.

The company, Toktumi, says that this time, it’s ready for the Pogue Effect. “Toktumi spent $100,000 in new server equipment. Expanded, better trained support team. More than 100,000 phone numbers available in inventory.” Well, O.K. then.

All I know is that I’ve been using Line2 for months, and love the ability to make calls indoors and in other corners of the world where the AT&T signal doesn’t reach. But to have that, unlimited texting and $30 or $40 a month off my AT&T bill?

That’s very persuasive indeed.
http://pogue.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/09/30/turn-an-ipod-into-an-iphone/?src=me&ref=technology

Financial Management

August 25, 2010


A beggar to another beggar: I had a grand dinner at Taj yesterday.

How? The other beggar asked.

First beggar: Some one gave me a Rs 100/- note yesterday.

I went to Taj and ordered dinner worth Rs 1,000/-,

And enjoyed the dinner. When the bill came, I said, I had no money.

The Taj manager called the policeman, and handed me over to him.

I gave the Rs 100/- note to the police fellow, and he set me free.

A wonderful example of financial management indeed